Angry Black Ladies vs. Me

If there's one thing in this world that pisses me of- it's people who oppose obscenity, to an extent.

Saying things like Damn, and Hell in front of children WILL NOT ruin their lives- so yesterday, when angry black lady yelled at me for cursing- bitch pissed me off.

We were sitting next to the swingset at the park. It was A-Tone, Little Man, Petitbon, Amber, and Myself- while another friend (Tyler) was sitting on the swings; ignoring us the whole time.

We were just hanging out making silly remarks on the day- when I look at Vito, and behind him I see an angry bubble-butt bitch staring at us, while leaning on some random playground material. I say into Little Man's ear "She's fucking staring at us", and everyone kinda agrees, and looks on their own.

A while passes, while we just sit around still talking; ignoring the black lady who looks like she could kick all of our asses.

Eventually, she joins the swingset with a little blonde girl who came with her. We still keep talking, then she gets off the swing... and Little Man stares directly at her when she looks over to us, and then she decided to speak up...

This is the conversation that happened between me and LaQueefa.

LaQueefa: I'm just making sure there ain't no one using goddamn foul language around my kids.
Me: Okay? Well, you kinda just said goddamn.
LaQueefa: Well I'm a grown woman, I'm almost thirty.
Me: Yeah, and I'm almost 18- so what?
LaQueefa: Listen, I have FOUR kids to take care of-
Me: That's not my problem.
LaQueefa: I'm just asking you nicely.
Me: You're not asking us nicely- you're bitching at us!
LaQueefa: No I'm not!
Me: Yes you are- you came over here and you're like "Goddamn foul language".

She stares at us a bit, and then walks away.

Goddamn I don't even know if LaQueefa is her name, but I wanted to get up and start screaming racial slurs at her.

- Josh

three 500 MG Hydrocodones.

There are some people who don't know me, who read my blog- this is widely understood; so before I explain a story, I must give details.

I used to have a bit of a pill problem. 5 - 10 various pills a day for about 3-6 months straight, though I kept it slightly secret.

So- knowing that, I can explain the following.

My friend (for the sake of this dramatization let's name her Amber) Amber smokes. She claims to only have done it 5 times (though the bullshit factor in her voice is above the stars), and her and I came to a recent promise; I wouldn't touch pills if she stopped smoking.

Fair agreement, I'd say.

WELL.

Today, I kind of overheard her in the midst of the attempted purchase of cigarettes from a friend who knew someone 18, and- I became INSTANTLY fucking pissed.

She broke a motherfucking promise... something I frown profoundly on.

So I stopped talking to her after that... but as I was sitting at the park... I was stricken with an idea.

She was sitting at the swings with some other mutual friends when I decided to do something.

After borrowing a bike, I rode home quickly- grabbed a bottle of water, and 3 Tylenol headache pills, and put them in a little baggy.

After I took the bike back to the friend I borrowed it from, I walked over to the swings; after everyone stole my water, and left me with only enough to swig from... I pulled the baggy out in front of Amber and some other friends. When I took out the pills and showed them to everyone I heard one person go "Oh fuck", and another "HOLY SHIT"- and then I took the three pills.

Amber was instantly struck with a look that went like "oh.... fuck.", or so it seemed to me.

One friend asked what they were, and I replied back "three 500 MG Hydrocodones" and someone I know named Marc was like "Holy fuck man, you're gonna be fucked up", to which I giggled a bit.

After 30 minutes of Amber (occasionally) giving me an angry stare, I got up- walked up to her at the swings and went "Those were three 250 MG Tylenol headache pills, don't fuck with me again". As I said this the only remaining friend over there (nicknamed Vito, sitting next to Amber on the swings) went "OH MY FUCKING GOD" and then we spoke of how I fucking got them.

Seriously- I don't care how fucking "stressed" you are.
Don't ever break a fucking promise to someone.

I told her that, and I also told her if she ever broke another promise like that again that next time they won't be headache pills...

Wanna know the best part of this? The person that they wanted to buy the cigarettes stiffed them, and didn't even get them.

The moral is... Grow up, leave your lungs alone- they're not there to hurt you, don't hurt them.

- Josh